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Monday, August 30, 2010

Did you know...

...that Rush Limbaugh got married for the fourth time. And he's worried about the gays ruining the sanctity of marriage.

...that this website exists. I stumbled upon it when I accidently searched for in Google Maps.

It's a completely generic website for a company called Illuminati Solutions. It has to be a joke, right? Or maybe it's some sort of front for the real Illuminati? I have a feeling that if I click on the right sequence of links on that page I'll end up at the real website and I'd be able to find out who really shot JFK, what really goes on in Area 51, what happens to my socks after they disappear in the dryer, what happened to Amelia Earhart and what the heck 2001: A Space Odyssey was all about. Then I'd disappear. They'd say I skipped town to start a new life in Tallahassee...but you'd all know the truth.

...that Dos Equis' "Most Interesting Man in the World" actually sounds a little like Stan Lee? This is crushing news. I know he's an actor and his exploits aren't real, but I at least thought his voice was real! This is like if I found out Dolly Parton's boobs are fake. It's...sad.
...that whenever you get stuck in bumper-to-bumper traffic here in the United States you can now take solace in knowing that it could be much, much worse.

...that apparently the above item has caused another mystery I assume the Illuminati would have an answer to....if I could only figure out the secret of that website.


  1. i had heard about the jam, but i hadn't heard about it disappearing


  2. I'm now picturing you feverishly clicking on that Illuminati webpage as different combinations of links glow in front of you, all to a pounding and slightly haunting score a la Beautiful Mind or The Da Vinci Code.

    Then you crack it, and The Man (possibly played by Ed Harris) shows up and takes you away, never to be heard from again.

    China just has to take everything we do, and do it one better, don't they?

    You have 5% of the world's population, we have 20%.

    You have 2 hour traffic jams, we have 10 day traffic jams.

    The extreme congestion reportedly has developed its own economy as merchants sell food, water and other essentials to stranded drivers at inflated prices.

    So basically, the freeway's been turned into a city.


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